Opening Prayer

Beloved God,

we welcome your presence here today as we join our hearts together as one in loving support of Bride and Groom.

We have come here today as families and  friends to see them off on their journey together as Marriage Partners. May we also be there to see them through.

We ask that you guide and protect Bride and Groom as they go forward through this world united in marriage.

We are deeply grateful for their presence in our lives and for the opportunity they have given us to bear witness to their great love for each other.

We are also profoundly grateful for the challenge that their love has presented to many of us to break free of our limiting beliefs of who was allowed to love whom and the judgments, prejudices, and forms of rejection that flow from such myopic views.

We thank Bride and Groom for their courage, wisdom, and capacity to love without condition and thus to serve us as great teachers of the power and sanctity of love. As stated in Matthew 9:16, what you have joined together, Beloved, may no man put  asunder.

Marriage Address

In every marriage union, as in every relationship in our lives, the success or failure of that coming together rests on the ability of the participants to simultaneously celebrate their oneness while honoring their differences.

As we all know, the “samenesses” and “differences” of Bride and Groom stand in stark contrast to what we have grown accustomed to as the norms of our society.

For some of us it was a challenge to see beyond that contrast and the temptation to negatively judge  them rather than to question our very own reaction to their love.

Some of us were quicker to embrace their love while others needed to find our way through inner and outer rules, learning and reinforcing an important life lesson— that nothing is more important than loving one another.

Perhaps making rules about who is allowed to love whom is foolish and ill-advised— an attempt to play God in matters that are God’s territory and not ours.

Has anyone here ever succeeded in making themselves love another? Try as we might to fake it— love has a purity and beauty that is unmistakable to us all and something to stand in awe of.

I have been officiated wedding ceremonies for all kinds of  couples. One thing that has always impressed me is that when a couple’s union challenges what we are used to,we are presented with the choice to either rise to this challenge or to hold tight to our limiting beliefs.

Whether bridging the gap between different races, cultures, religions, or age groups, or being more similar than we are used to as in couples of the same gender, these couples have a freedom that many of us lack.

They are available to love regardless of race, creed, color, situation, circumstance, or environment. There are no walls around their hearts that prevent them from allowing love to occur.

And, occur it did between Bride and Groom!

What an interesting lesson for the rest of us. How would our individual and collective lives be different if our hearts were also unbound by rules and beliefs that we must only love others who are quite like us, but then, not too much like us?

I celebrate Bride and  Groom And all couples who challenge us to unbind our hearts and render ourselves vulnerable to the power and possibilities of love.

Candle Ceremony

From every human being there rises a light that reaches straight to heaven.

When two souls who are destined to be together find  each other, their streams of light flow together, and a single brighter light goes forth from their united being.

Human love is not a substitute for divine love— it is an extension of  it.

Bride and Groom, when you see each other as the divine and eternal beings that you are, you will never cease to wonder and glory in your coming together.

The purpose of human love is to awaken love for God.

The truth that is continually reborn is that within each human being burns the spark of the divine.

When two people love one another with devotion and freedom, they kindle the awareness of that spark in each other as nothing else quite can  do.

Bride and Groom, in committing to one another today, you kindle one another’s divine light and promise always to do your best to see that light in one another, to nurture and tend that divine flame in your partner  as best you can each day, especially at the times it may be hardest to do, and the times your partner may doubt or forget the existence of that light within him or herself.

Bride, take this candle now, and light it from the center candle representing the divine source. As you do so, symbolically enter the sacred trust to honor the divine spirit in Groom.

Groom, as you light this candle from  the  divine  source, symbolically enter the sacred trust to honor the divine spirit in Bride.

Now, bring your individual flames together, symbolizing the new and greater flame of your marriage, remembering that just as this union is made stronger by your strength as individuals, so are you as individuals made stronger by the strength of this union.

And never forget that the light of your union, while made up of your unique and individual expressions of light, is continually sustained and renewedby your connection to the eternal and inexhaustible light of God, the Source.

Wedding Vows

Before Bride and Groom share their wedding vows I thought you might like to know that they have kept them secret from one another until now.

Groom:

My beloved Bride, I have spent most of my life alone and much of it profoundly devoted to my soul work and to being of service in this world. I have not pitied myself my solitary  life. I recognized its authenticity while still hoping that someday I might be blessed with a true  partnership of loving, cherishing, honoring, and nurturing shared with a beautiful Wife and equal, lover and best friend.

With you, Bride, my dreams have come true and  been  surpassed beyond my wildest dreams.

I can’t imagine that I will ever stop lighting up when you walk into a room. I am so grateful to be here with you today surrounded by our families and friends and filled with joy and  enthusiasm for whatever our future brings— knowing that we will stand side by side through it all.

I will not make false promises to you about being your perfect partner— after all, I will continue to be me  with all my faults and frailties— though hopefully my rough edges will soften over time.

I do however make you these promises:

I will continue my devotion to my soulwork and to support you in  yours, knowing that our sacred paths are  now intertwined in new and exciting ways.

I will do my very best to love you in the ways you need and want to be loved for the rest of my  life.

I promise to keep learning more each day how to love you, honor  you, and respect you in ways that tickle your fancy.

Bride, I will forever be grateful for the blessing of having you in my life.

Bride:

Groom, my love, the blessings we share are captured in the following two  excerpts:

The first is from Rumi’s “The Wandering”— The minute I heard my first love  song I started looking for  you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. they’re in each other all along.

The second piece I want to share with you I tweaked a bit from D. H. Lawrence’s poem “Fidelity”—  Two people in love are like the earth, that brings forth flowers in summer, and love, but underneath is rock. Older than flowers, older than ferns, older than foraminiferae, older than plasma altogether is the soul underneath. And when, throughout all the wild chaos of love slowly a gem forms, in the ancient, once-more-molten rocks of two human hearts, two ancient rocks, the hearts of two lovers that is the crystal of peace, the slow hard jewel of trust, the sapphire of  fidelity. The gem of mutual peace emerging from the wild chaos of love.

We certainly have had our share of chaos, my love. But, we also got the prize, the brass ring, the sapphire.

Thank you for having the fortitude to walk this path together so far.

We have indeed earned the power and privilege of our love.

I am honored and filled with joy to be here beside you entering into the sacred and joyous covenant of marriage. You can count on me to be there for you and for usfor the rest of my  life.

Groom, my love,

I will be by your side no matter what life brings our way. You will always be surrounded by my love.

Ring Exchange

May I have the rings, please.

These rings are symbols of the love that joins you spirit to spirit.mMay they serve you and those who see them upon your fingers as a reminder of the oneness, eternity, and renewal inherent in the marriage union. Like arms that embrace, these wedding rings you give and receive this day reflect the circle of your shared  love.

May they also serve to remind you of the freedom and the power of your love.

May they be for you always your most treasured adornment, and may the love they symbolize be your most treasured possession. Groom, place this ring on Bride’s finger.

Groom:

Bride, this ring is a symbol of the strength and beauty of our  love.

May it belong to your hand as my heart belongs to you, separate yet close,simple yet miraculous. Bride, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow. May it encircle your finger always, as my love will your heart.

Bride:

Groom, this ring is a symbol of the strength and beauty of our  love. May it belong to your hand as my heart belongs to you, separate yet close,simple yet miraculous. Groom, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow. May it encircle your finger always, as my love will your heart.

Final Blessing and Pronouncement

Bride and Groom,

on behalf of your loved ones gathered here with you today,  I would like to mention some of the things we wish for you:

First, we wish for you a love that is rich, deep, and powerful enough to inspire others to support you both in bringing forth the best that is within you. May you lavishly love one another and love being loved by one another today, tomorrow, and always.

Second, may you sustain a deep and abiding friendship in which you are considerate of each other, kind, thoughtful, and so much more.

Third, we wish for you the kind of home that will be a sanctuary for you both, a place of peace, freedom, vitality, growth, and humor.

Finally, we wish that at the end of your lives you will be able to look back and smile upon the life that you have shared together, pleased, satisfied, and fulfilled beyond your wildest dreams.

And now, By virtue of the authority vested in me by the First Nation Church and the Knights of St. Valentine and in accordance with the laws of the State of the Maryland, it is my honor to pronounce you partners in marriage.

You may kiss for the first time as husband and wife.